“Setbacks Are Only Temporary, Try Gratitude” by: Gina Quarles

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We all have setbacks in life. Whether it be from an illness, to loss of a job, to a severed relationship or loss of a loved one. It is natural to become discouraged while in the middle of a setback. I decided to blog about this as I have had some discouragement going on for about two weeks now.

As most of you know, I am lucky to even be alive since my near death auto accident in 2012. After a total of fifteen surgeries and the last one being on my right foot, I still have days that set me back. Since I only but luckily have one working artery in my lower right leg (usually we have three), I have to treat my foot as a diabetic foot. Which includes wearing my custom shoe insert so my spine is aligned properly, keeping my foot moisturized in certain areas where the blood flow is limited, along with elevating my foot periodically throughout my day and some rest.

My daughters came to spend the summer with me and I must admit, I over did it. I was so over joyed with them being here.  We had so much fun and of course we stayed very busy running round, going out on our boat, trips to the mall, out to eat, letting my sixteen year old practice driving, you name it and we did it! I did not want to rest and savored every single moment with them.  I did not realize I was “out of my routine” and did not take the necessary care of my foot. Honestly, I did not even notice a problem until the end of the visit. One of the toes on my right foot wont heal. It is a pressure wound from too much activity.

Since they have left, I have been dealing with this wound in what feels like forever. I have been laid up in bed or the couch, while trying to avoid walking on it as little as I possibly can. My mind says, “GO” and my body is saying,” NO!” Not an easy task with my five year old needing my attention. I found myself suffering from guilt. Oh the mental abuse I put myself through was so unnecessary.

My thoughts ran from missing my two girls as we said our good bye’s. Yes, many tears flowed for days. I was consumed with guilt from to not being able to help my hubby with running our household. My husband kept reassuring me and comforting me. I soon realized it was “I” that was beating myself up mentally.

My thoughts changed from guilt and sadness to feelings of gratitude. My thoughts shifted to having an appreciation for the health and the time I did get to enjoy with my two girls. This time last year I would have never been able to do much of anything with them! Then I began to appreciate the fact that I even have a leg/foot to complain about and remembering I could have lost it completely!

The reason for this post is to illustrate to you that yes, setbacks do happen and of course we get discouraged, sad or frustrated. But while you are in it, try to look for something to be grateful for. You are alive, you are breathing, that alone is a simple one we often take for granted. Be gentle on yourself. The world is not going to stop rotating on it’s axis and it will get better.

I am often my own worst enemy with the things I let run through mind during setbacks. They key is to first become aware of them. Then you have a choice. You can choose to throw yourself a pity party that lasts entirely too long or you can look for all that is going good in your life. That, my friends is what opens the door to gratitude.

Gratitude is the best remedy for all discouragement we will ever face. There is always something in this big planet we all share to experience some gratitude. Gosh, that felt good just to blog about!

Let’s try to fit more gratitude in our everyday busyness this week. I bet it will change our outlook for the better:)!

XOXO!

Gina

 

 

September 9, 2014

“Healing In The Midst of Loss & Joy” by:Gina Quarles

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I have been doing much reflection about my life and what it all means to me. I have had many years with with memories of both joy and loss. My wish is that we embrace them both. Embracing your joy and your loss sounds complicated, but it is not. Even in loss there are gifts. We may not see it that way right now, but trust me it is a gift.

I have learned with the loss of a failed marriage of thirteen years, a loss of a personal friendship, family changes, a relationship of any kind or death of a loved one, that it can tear you to into pieces. But, in that tearing apart, parts can be put back together in a loving way. Meaning, in the loss of a loved one, you have not lost them. You have all of the memories of that person with you forever and we can rejoice in that. In failed relationships, they may have failed and ended. If they have, they too have taught you what to do and not to do in the future ones coming to you. It takes two people to make a relationship fail and be accountable where you have failed as well. Stop blaming the other person and your past or childhood. We all have to grow up sometime:).

If you have made an apology to someone and it was rejected, know that  you did your part. You are being loving by being able to admit your shortcomings. Some people cannot admit they have failed and they will be able to, hopefully with time. Hold them in your mind and or prayers with love. When you can do this, you are free. If you need to apologize to someone and cannot say it, maybe write a letter. But give yourself that gift of accountability. It will strengthen you and bring joy.

In the joy, pat yourself on the back and love yourself for a job well done. I have had to work on this as well.  We cannot expect others to fill all of our needs.  We have to love ourselves in order to give love others in our lives. Sometimes, it is an  act of offering of yourself and you may feel  uncomfortable in doing so. It gets easier each time.  After my accident in 2012 I felt all of the out pouring of love and prayers from thousands of you ( not an exaggeration )! This has shown me a new hope and faith in the human race. I thank all those  that I know and those I do not know. Hence the power of prayer chains. That has inspired me to do the same for others because it works! I fully know from the depths of my soul, it was prayer that sustained me and kept me fighting the fight of my life. That energy was sent out there, it was received by a desperate will and pleading with GOD from myself as well.  I do remember that very vividly. There were at least four times, that I am aware of  that should not have made it. Hard words to write, but I can accept this and by the grace of GOD He heard us. This was discovered through digging through all of my medical records and hearing from others that the nurses were “just waiting”. But I am still here!!! Thank you!!!

I have had to endure much loss.  Loss of identity, loss of some relationships, loss of control, loss of order, loss of parts of my inner being and true self.  I was fragmented. In context, when I reflect, I can now see there was a reason. When you can accept any loss and allow yourself time to feel, grieve, get angry, whatever emotion that needs to surface, allow it to surface, That is when healing and growth begins. I could not understand why or how my husband could want to take care of me. I could not do a thing for myself when I came home. He could have sent me into a rehabilitation home. But he chose not to. Yes, it would have been easier for him with all of the other responsibilities he holds here, but he did it out of love for me. I am so appreciative and so thankful. That is true love. From the moment he was on the phone with me and I went off the road, he was with me the whole way and still is. I am so grateful for his loving heart and stamina.

It is not an easy task to rejoice at times, as we can so often get caught up in the “should have’s”, the “I deserve more” and the “why’s?”. But, that is not the here and now anymore. Right here, right now is what we have.  I encourage you to notice it.  I encourage you to not take it for granted. Time flies, things change, people grow and change. Love these precious moments of life we have been given with all of your heart as we cannot go back. We can only push forward.

Push forward with a student heart. Be a learner and a seeker and  be open to new ideas. You do not have to agree with them.  But do listen.  Sometimes, somethings we think we do not agree with, actually prompts a positive change or births a new idea. That is what creates a new for hope and a better world we can all live in.

We were each given certain gifts when we were born and as we grow we develop them. Share them with the world for a higher good.  We are so much more than we think we are capable of.  We are here to love and if we let that encompass everything, we will find a life of joy. You can let go of things in love as well.  We can accept things in love. All things are capable of being used in love. We just need to change our perspective on our goals.  What are we really trying to accomplish?

If it is pride or being right, let it go.  There will always be someone who is smarter than you, more gifted in a certain area than you are. Your job is to find  and use your special gift. Use it in the power of love and with a generous heart. I promise if it is done with a loving intention, you will succeed.

I do not proclaim to have all of this under my belt as it is still a goal of mine as well. I feel our whole lives here on this earth are a continual lesson and we need to be receptive to what the world is trying to tell us.  Try to seek it in nature and solitude when given the time.  The best clarity comes to me in nature and being still.  You have to make that time a priority for yourself regardless of all other obligations.  The “other stuff” will still be waiting for you when you return. But, you may just find you can tackle them with a clearer vision.

Best of the best to all of you and whatever you may be facing.  Go for it with a warrior spirit and discipline! May GOD’s presence show you the way on all of your endeavors.

XOXO,

Gina

September 2, 2014

Spreading Awareness “Human Trafficing” Join The A21 Campaign by: Gina Quarles

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Hello Friends,

As most of you know I am an abolitionist for the Key to Free A21 Campaign and involved with the fight against human trafficking.  I encourage you to read more about this widespread problem.  It is not only in other countries, it is here as well in the United States.  The more we educate and spread awareness the less likely the innocent, confused, broken and the very desperate  will be lured into this heinous crime.

XOXO,

Gina

The A21 Campaign AUS Address: PO Box 7820, Baulkham Hills BC, NSW 2153, Australia USA Address: 427E 17th Street # F223, Costa Mesa, CA 92627, USA AUS Phone: +61 (0) 2 8985 6819 USA Phone: +1 949 202 4681 AUS Fax: +61 (0) 2 8079 6940 USA Fax: +1 949 612 0827 Web: www.theA21campaign.org Email: info@theA21campaign.org
           Help me create some awareness by forwarding to your friends!
Hey Abolitionist,KEY2FREE is officially only one week away!There is so much anticipation, momentum, and excitement building as stories are beginning to pour in from people around the globe who are planning to join us in the fight for freedom on October 18th. Because you have played a significant role through supporting A21 in the past, we wanted to send you this exclusive update with everything you need to be a part of the solution.If you haven’t had a chance to join KEY2FREE on Facebook and invite your friends, here is your chance! Let’s really get the word out about KEY2FREE so more people can become aware of human trafficking so they too can help stop it. We have also created KEY2FREE Resources you can print or post online.Would you like to host a KEY2FREE event? If so, you can download an event pack here.Be sure to also watch and share the new KEY2FREE video that was just released this week! Please feel free to email KEY2FREE@thea21campaign.org with any questions, ideas, or to share your KEY2FREE stories. Our team would love to hear
from you!We are so thankful for your support
and we appreciate you.
Together we can make a difference.For justice,The A21 Campaign

 

 

 

 

August 26, 2014

“Something” Many Do Not Like To Face… By: Gina Quarles

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As many of you know I receive emails  from my followers asking specific questions either about my recovery or how I keep pressing on after such a horrific experience. I do my very best and never claim to be an expert in any field. I share from my personal experiences and if I cannot answer you, I will do my best to direct you to someone or a site that may be able to help you.

This week I received an email from someone who wishes to remain unknown. I will respect that wish. It was such an important question and resonated with me on such a level that I had to do a blog post about the topic. That topic being, “How do you remain happy when you are dealing with loss?”. The question caused me ponder a bit and think, which I love to do.  It dawned on me that you do not read or see much about his very real issue being addressed. Really what is loss?

Loss is different for all of us I believe. However, we do share some losses that are difficult and in common for all of us. For example, in the loss or passing of a loved one, a divorce, an affair, loss of a job etc. But, what about the loss of an identity? What about the loss of a limb? What about the loss of a passion you are no longer able to live out?

It makes me think of a great quote by Ralph Waldo Emerson, “I wish to say what I think and feel today, with the provision that tomorrow perhaps I shall contradict it all.” Think about that for a few seconds. Thought provoking isn’t it?

Loss is a very real part of life. We plan and we set expectations up for ourselves and our children. Sometimes some of the plan plays out for us and at others times, only part of it does. Or at other times, some mind blowing storm can come into your life with little or no preparation for it. This is the type of loss I am referring to.

I feel we need to have an open mind to everything that can and could happen in life. That may require some thinking out of the box, or looking at yourself and some real soul searching. It requires turning off the programming we have been raised with and what society has engrained in us as to what is right or how to feel or even behave.

One thought came to me and it was, if we never suffered and really “really” felt and endured losses, how would we ever notice any progress  within our lives?  We would not. For myself that would be a sad and a boring existence. I remember reading the words of Michelangelo and he basically said,  it is bad to set high expectations, the problem is, if we do achieve them, they are too low.  I love that thought. Some may say huh? Many people are comfortable where they are. We need challenges in our lives to grow. I believe we all have a spark in us that was GOD given from the day we were put here on this earth. We are capable of so much more than we even are aware of. Miracles can manifest right before our eyes if we are open and surrender. If  we can keep an open mind and do not fight everything with, “but I did not want this” or “this cannot be happening to me!” type attitude. We will receive many hidden treasures, even if we do not see them immediately.

For when there is loss, something else shows up If you are in the flow of life  and not micromanaging everything around you, you can and will find a way to turn it into something beautiful. You may have a season of depression, but it will pass if you keep yourself open to receiving and really searching for the new. The key is to keep seeking. In order to receive you must relinquish control. I know, it is not easy. The ironic thing is that when you can do this and embrace very setback and or hurdle or monkey thrown at you, you will conquer it. You will deal with losses in a new way.  You will view your losses as opportunities for change. Suddenly you just know with certain confidence and a maturity that this life is just temporary. It is  role we are just playing out here while on this earth. We are  not the screenwriter. You know who is. GOD is however you conceive HIM to be or understand HIM.

When you can let go, let GOD and walk in faith knowing you have HIM in charge, I am telling you, you can handle anything. As scriptures read, “With GOD all things are possible.” Pretty amazing isn’t it? Not just “some” things are possible, “all” things! If you do not believe me, read my story on my front page under, “About Me”. I had all odds against me. I should have died four times. I prayed harder than ever during that time that curve ball came chasing me in full force. While many  parts of me were completely destroyed and lost, something new arrived. There is the part of you even while unconscious, you are aware. I believe it is our soul.

Some may say it sounds crazy, that is okay.  I no longer dwell on what others say or think. I am free and more confident now than I have ever been. I know  as I met my maker in a sense. When someone does not give me the approval I am looking for, it only brings more motivation to me. It is an inner knowing that there is more than meets the eyes.  I compels me to share  even more when others cannot  accept what I have lived or mock what I my say. To those willing to surrender and experience change and really live their lives, it fuels me while they are being fueled as well.

Loss is never the end. Loss hurts, loss is real, but it is also a powerful launching pad into greatness. Be open. There is so much more than meets the eye. Just try it sooner rather than later.

Have a great weekend & go explore:)

XOXO,

Gina

 

July 31, 2014

What An Honor It Was…:By:Gina Quarles

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Yesterday I was on  Deb Scott’s “Best People We Know Show”. Deb is the author of “The Sky is Green and The Grass is Blue” – Turning your upside down world right side up! A wonderful book that I purchased and read myself much earlier than being invited on her show.

When you read someone’s book that resonates with you and you feel a connection with that person through their book, you feel as if you know them personally. It is a wonderful and empowering book! Her book is on Amazon and be sure to read her author biography page. You will want the book. She is so inspiring.

Today I received an email from her and she informed me that our interview had made the “Staff Pick of the Day” on Blogtalk Radio! if you look under “Today’s Best” You will see-
Gina’s Book, “The Accidental Purpose” Applaud Women – Women’s International Entrepreneur & Professional Network Reinventing You
http://www.blogtalkradio.com/

While I was on her show, I offered a special to the listeners and I want to extend that to you as well. I am feeling much gratitude for all I have been blessed with and where my life is going since my accident, I want to give some back to all of you:). Your words, your tweets, your messages, and emails lift me up and encourage me more than I can express.

I am offering my paperback book, “The Accidental Purpose” ( normally $16.00 plus shipping from Amazon, Barnes & Noble, and Inthebookstand.com) for $14.00, signed, including a bookmark and free shipping from me to you.

Please email:ginashere@gmail.com put “The Book” in the subject line. Include your name and ship to address and if you want a special message in your book, pls make note of it in the email. Please pay with PayPal using my email address to send your payment.

If you want to listen to the show please click here for the interview:

I hope you feel inspired and know that you can always begin again where ever you are!

Gina

A Second Chance at Life: Gina Quarles : The Accidental Purpose

Just a reminder, the show “A Second Chance at Life: Gina Quarles : The Accidental Purpose” by Best People We Know is starting soon.

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Hi Best People We Know

A Second Chance at Life: Gina Quarles : The Accidental Purpose

By Best People We Know

June 30, 201411:00:00 AM EDT
60 Minutes

Call in to speak with the host:
(347) 637-1318


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Gina Quarles; Best Selling Author of the memoir The Accidental Purpose: My Unexpected Nightmare Revealed with the Gift of Hope, Amazon best seller in Women’s Inspiration, Own Ambassador. After a shattering car accident Gina had a second chance at life. In a halo for months, broken leg and emotional heartache, Gina unexpectedly discovered healing through heartache. Priorities changed, perceptions changed, purpose for life changed. Gina shares how her greatest pain became her most wonderful gain in getting real with life and learning inner peace is a priceless gift available to all. Gina is a series author for Creativity-Portal.com, and her blog has been awarded a Top 7 Blogs that Inspire by Searching for Happiness.com. “My hope is that my story will change your perspective on life and give you some tools to deal with anything difficult you are enduring. I believe I was spared for a reason and that would be to share my story of hope. If it touches one person, I will accomplished my task.” Divorced and remarried with three children and three step children Gina says her new family is like a modern day Brady Bunch. Gina now lives in Texas making each moment matter for herself and everyone she meets. Visit http://ginaquarles.com/ Connect with Deb at: http://www.DebScott.comBroadcast in Women

July 1, 2014

“Lightspiration” What Does It Mean? By: Gina Quarles

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I stumbled upon a site and it immediately grabbed my attention. From the name to the Logo I was intrigued. I often share with you many inspiring books and or organizations that I admire. Please read on and consider becoming a part of this. This is just awesome to me as you know how important I feel our world needs more encouragement, hope & inspiration. All we have to do is share it with others. It is so easy and we all need more of it spreading around as we navigate through our sometimes dark world.

Lightspiration is the product of our imaginations and passion for recognizing the light in life. We have discovered the beauty present in everyday things and have made it our way of life. Our mission is to help you ignite the light in your life and help those around you to accomplish the same fulfilling mindset we have come to love. We hope to inspire you through our products and concepts we have created. Our main purpose is not only to inspire, but also to give back. At the end of every month we will take a portion of all profit made and donate it! Each month we will choose a new place, and we want you to be apart of the decision process! We want to make a difference, and hope you will join us on this journey to making a difference in the world!

Where Do You Fit In?
        We want you to be a part of our journey in spreading light. Please contact us with ideas, questions, or stories that will help us to bring the light around everyone to the surface. Anything that is brought to us by you will be highly considered, and if we choose to implement your idea into our concepts, you will be credited for that! We want to create a community with you, so we can all work together to spread light as far as we can!
“When one knows light,
possibilities become limitless.”
- Lightspiration – 

Please visit: http://www.lightspiration.org

Share the light~Gina

June 23, 2014

“Your” Discovery Journey… by:Gina Quarles

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As I sit here and write this new blog post, my memoir, “The Accidental Purpose” is sitting in Amazon’s Best Sellers in “Women’s Inspirational Spirituality” (#37). It is absolutely amazing and surreal at times when I let it all really soak in.

This book really birthed itself from others encouragement, my  ongoing thoughts that kept nagging me, and many other divine appointments that I describe in my book. It was a emotional memoir to write, but so very healing as I reflect on it now.

Never, ever in my wildest dreams would I think I would be a published author who had actually written a book? Or even a memoir (those are harder to get out there) unless you are someone that is well known.

The point of this post is not to shine on me. The point of this post is to show you what you can do in any arena of your life if you are “open”. You do not need a near death accident to get you there either. You see, I dabbled in poetry more than sixteen years ago. A few were published in local publications. It was a gift I never knew I had until I played with it and  discovered it was in me. Then as some of you know from reading the book, my “treadmill” of a life took over. I stopped writing as I thought I did not have time for that anymore. I was now known as “MOM”.

I want to encourage all of you to carve out some time just for yourself. In just your own company, get out of your safety zone and try something new. Then keep on going. Eventually something is going to grab you and you will be so interested in learning more about it. Stay with it. Practice it. Dare to put it “out there”.

What is the worst thing that could happen? Some “1” may not like it. Emphasis on the number “1”. Do you know how many people we share the world with? Do you know how many people you can share your new craft with via: the web? Today  now more than ever their is an audience waiting for something new. Most likely the very thing GOD made you good at when He created you with your gifts. I use plural form “gifts”,  as I believe we all have more than one gift. They just have not expressed themselves yet.

I am daring myself to continue digging deep. It is actually when you get that confirmation from above that for now,  this (whatever “this” may be) is what I am to be doing now. I believe it is fluid. It often changes over time as we grow and continue to learn more about our true nature. Not what others or what the world tells we are. It is what we discover we are.

You se, for myself, that is what living a fulfilling life is all about. To  desire that beautiful and continual curiosity of this wonderful place we all share together. Many times we will find when we dare to step out in courage and dig deep that our gifts and others gifts actually compliment one another. Now that is powerful.

Get out there this week. Go carve out time with yourself and play while discovering. I just know you will find something that has been within you waiting to be found.

Have a wonderful and blessed week on your journey to discover the one and only “you”!!

XOXO!

Gina

 

 

June 16, 2014

Honoring Father’s on Father’s Day: Gina Quarles

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It is that special time of the year where we all pay tribute and appreciate all of the great Father’s out there:). Fathers are the ones who make the world a better place. Where ever your Dad is on this Father’s Day, today is the day to appreciate all of their hard work and dedication. A Father guides his children in the way they should go. They teach them how to navigate in our big world. They are their little girls first love and you will often hear little girls announce in delight, “I want to marry daddy”. This is why the job of a father is so important. Studies have shown that the way a father behaves is what girls internalize and learn as their worth. This is how they feel they should be treated as women.
Being a Father is such an important role not only for our girls, but our boys as well. Fathers teach their boys how to be a true man. Fathers teach their sons how to protect, support and honor their families as the leader of the home. They also teach them how to treat women. The cycle continues and repeats through generations after generations.
Some of us have others take the place of our biological fathers as some have passed away, some have abandoned their responsibility and others stepped in. That person for myself was my dear Grandfather. He taught me so many important lessons. My “Gramps” lessons still play in my head today as a parent myself. Others have adopted children, others are women who are single moms and play the roles of both mommy and daddy. Hats off to you ladies! You have much on your plate and please know your children will remember your unfailing and unconditional love.
Whomever your Father figure today or perhaps was and now in Heaven, please say a prayer of thanks for the love you have received. We learn from our parents. As adults we carry what we grew up with as we ourselves are trying to find our place in this world.
The most important Father we all need to honor is the ONE who gave life to us all. Our Heavenly Father. The ONE who created each and every one of us and the ONE who placed the people that lived out the role as “Father” in our lives. Thank you GOD for blessing us all with families and Fathers. We may not all have the same family situation or lifestyles, but I encourage you to express some gratitude for GOD breathing life into you. HE put you where you are now for a specific reason and all of our paths and reasons are unique.
I want to thank my GOD for my life, nature’s canvas, little things we can sometimes take for granted and showing me the way when I get overwhelmed. I thank HIM for my wonderful husband who stepped in and accepted my children from my first marriage and supported them in all ways as his own. I want to thank my husband for caring for me, as Dad, Breadwinner, friend, errand runner, cook, you name it! I love you so much Mike.
Hears to all those awesome people and Fathers out there. May you have and celebrate you! Happy Father’s Day!
XOXO,
Gina

June 12, 2014

Consider “The Sandy Hook Promise”-Gina Quarles

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Today I received an email from an organization I am involved in. It is called the Sandy Hook Promise. I got involved after I had learned about this very sad day .This day as most of us know involved the  horror that took place in a shooting spree that killed so many innocent children and adults. Watching the families as they faced the pain, remains etched in my memory as I can still see them and all of the losses of such an unnecessary and evil act.

Below read the Sandy Hook Promise:

The Sandy Hook Promise

Our hearts are broken;
Our spirit is not.

And it is with this knowledge
that we are able to move forward
with purpose and strength.

This is a Promise

To truly honor the lives lost
by turning our tragedy into a moment of transformation.

This is a Promise

To be open to all possibilities.
There is no agenda other than to make
our community and our nation a safer, better place.

This is a Promise

To have the conversations on ALL the issues
Conversations where listening is as important as speaking.
Conversations where even those with the most opposing views
can debate in good will.

This is a Promise

To turn the conversation into actions.
Things must change.
This is the time.

This is a Promise

We make to our precious children.
Because each child, every human life is filled with promise,
and though we continue to be filled with unbearable pain
we choose love, belief, and hope
instead of anger.

This is a Promise

To do everything in our power to be remembered
not as the town filled with grief and victims;
but as the place where
real change began.

Our hearts are broken;
Our spirit is not.

This is our Promise…

Here is my email that I would ask you kindly to read and consider joining in on. We need a change and this is a huge step towards a major one. We can all make a difference if we choose to step up, join in and help others to become aware of this. That is why I am posting it. Please share with those you know. The more the message gets out, the more lives we can save. We will create more of an awareness and make an impact for our world.

Here is the email including the links to click on to help you learn more of how you can get involved and help a positive change.

Here is the email.

“Gina,

In the 18 months since I lost my wife Mary, a dedicated school psychologist who would kneel down or sit in a low chair when talking to students to make sure they felt heard, in the senseless rampage at Sandy Hook Elementary, I’ve spoken out to bring more focus and attention to mental health and wellness.

I’ve said to anyone and everyone listening that if we can keep even one potential shooter from getting to the point where the Sandy Hook shooter, the UC Santa Barbara shooter and too many others have gotten to, we’ll have honored Mary and some good will have come from the big hole in my family’s lives.

I’m thankful the U.S. House finally took action last week and passed a bipartisan amendment boosting funding for the background checks system that helps prevent firearms from falling into the hands of criminals and the severely mentally ill. It’s an important step – but it’s only a first step.

Please contact your representative now to thank the House for taking action and urge them to now quickly pass a common sense bill to help reduce gun violence committed by the mentally ill, which we at Sandy Hook Promise believe will help save even more lives.

Click here to thank the House for taking a first step and urge them to move quickly to pass the Promoting Healthy Minds for Safer Communities bill.

Mental illness does not lead to gun violence – the mentally ill are more often victims than perpetrators – but there are common sense solutions to reduce gun violence committed by the mentally ill and the time to act is now. The new Promoting Healthy Minds bill introduced last week would be a big step toward what we at Sandy Hook Promise have been working for.

This common sense proposal would provide funding for community-based and school-based mental health programs, strengthen existing gun safety policies by keeping firearms out of the hands of those committed to mental health outpatient treatment and stop those convicted of stalking or domestic abuse from buying guns.

It’s likely the fanatical fringe minority who oppose common sense solutions will bully representatives to oppose this bill, even though it could save countless lives. So it’s crucial that Congress hears from you and all of us – tens of thousands of parents, husbands, wives and loved ones united by love and determined to make change.

Don’t miss this critical opportunity to help protect your children and the children you love – please, contact your representative now.

Stand with Sandy Hook Promise – thank the House for taking a first step and urge your representative to support the Promoting Healthy Minds bill.

Mary loved her job – it was what she always believed she was meant to do. When Mary and a family were able to claim success as a result of the work done by all concerned, it made for a Top Ten day, lifting her spirit, and her desire to continue on. I know she would have supported what we’re working to do.

Passing this bill would be instrumental in turning my own tragedy, as we say at Sandy Hook Promise, into a moment of transformation for the entire country. Please, join us in making that happen by contacting your representative now.

Thank you so much for your support,

Bill Sherlach”

Please consider joining me for such an important cause.

XOXO!

Gina

June 5, 2014

Why Necessary Boundaries Are So Vital-By: Gina Quarles

Published Post author

Sometimes being honest is not as easy as it sounds.  When you are honest with yourself and with others, it requires courage depending on the subject matter.  I am speaking about raw honesty.  It involves the risk of hurting by admitting something you never ever wanted to face.  It may include the need of setting some necessary boundaries.  At times, people like to pretend those boundaries are not there. They will fight you like crazy to avoid seeing them.  They do this because it is hard for them to admit to themselves that there may be something there from some harm they may have caused you. They cannot admit this to themselves. They refuse to be accountable for their actions.  To many people, this is scary. It requires a certain level of maturity to be accountable and to admit we are not flawless.  The boundaries you have created are out of necessity for protection of yourself. They may be with friends, family or coworkers. Creating boundaries is not the hard part.  The hard part lies within being consistent with the boundaries you have created. It is easy to get distracted, try to rewind life and pretend that painful things did not happen to you. But that may not be your reality. It is easier to focus on what feels more comfortable or our old patterns of living. When we do this, we are allowing harm to come near us.  Warning!!! Do not do this.  Stay focused on your most important asset.  That asset is YOU! If you are a parent, it is your job to protect your children from this harm as well.  This is an ugly topic.  It is one I have I tried to avoid for so many years.  As a child and on into early adulthood, I used to be in so much pain and just wanted everyone to be happy. I was the text book “peace maker”. However, it was at the expense of hurting myself in the process. I grew tired. I was the true definition of a peacemaker and it was not in a healthy way. This way of dealing with toxic people takes a conscious practice. It requires honoring yourself above the very ones who have caused you the pain. You must retrain your brain. I will be optimistic and say that maybe those people can change or maybe they cannot. Lesson here…YOU cannot change others only yourself.  Only time will tell and YOU are in charge of what “time” you need to figure it out.  It needs to be done on your watch and not theirs. That is if you are even considering allowing them back in your personal space. I hope it is never this extreme for you.  But I know many people, including myself that have had to end up eventually dealing with this. So, with that in mind, please remember you are an adult. You have basic rights. No one ever said you were made and had to tolerate harm, even if it comes in the form of people.  There are too many other “good” people in this world to fill your circle with. You can easily pick them out of the crowds.  They are the people who are smiling. They are radiating with a positive energy about them.  They are not the takers.  They are the givers.  The thought of knowing I can choose, makes me smile:).  I hope it brings the same freedom to you! XOXO, Gina

May 28, 2014